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Why get in shape? 

For obvious reasons, but, I believe that getting in shape is an important step to getting what you really want in life. Who cares what you have if you don't have your health! Good physical health leads to good mental health. And I'm challenging you to get on top of it now. 

I have stuck with working out for close to 40 years. And, I've worked with the folks at Total Gym for almost 20! So believe me when I tell you, there is no better deal on this gym than the one they're offering right here! So, get your Z on and get in shape. 
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Let me ask you, “What’s wrong with teaching boys to be gentlemen?”

God knows there’s a shortage of them.

I mentioned in my last post that among other things, I/we (my wife and I) teach our boys the virtues of gentleman behavior.

And I’m not just talking about acting civilly, but chivalry as well.

Once, when I was in high school, I left my mother outside by the curb and proceeded into school with all my buddies.

It was a mistake.

My mother, in an effort to reinforce the lessons she had started when I was a little boy, stood patiently waiting for me to return.

Too cool for school, I had hoped against hope that she would just come in like most of the other parents in attendance.

But she didn’t. She just stood out there. And I knew why.

I slouched and walked back outside to find her standing there, just outside the door.  

Unsettled, embarrassed … ashamed, I took hold of the door and opened it.

She hesitated, and then, without a word, walked in. And so did another lesson in my life.

What’s wrong with being a gentleman? Is it out of date … forgotten?

Have we as society evolved to the point that being a gentleman has no virtue. So much so that it’s something we have given up on as parents—as a society.

We, parents, our society, our school systems all require kids to take music, art, gym and a language knowing that only a handful of kids will ever play an instrument , become an artist, play sports or speak a foreign language when they grow to be adults.

But that doesn’t keep us from exposing, teaching our kids these things.


Because there is value in these things ... There is value in teaching any virtue that can be carried through your adult life. And those who hold these virtues create value in their own … and in the lives of those they touch.

So why not teach our boys to be chivalrous—to be gentlemen. It’s a virtue. I would think it’s rather ballsy to be chivalrous today.

Ladies, does it bother you if a man holds your door? Lets you go first? Helps you with your packages?  Minds his manners in your presence?


The way I see it, if our boys spend years learning to treat the lady in their life this way, then there’s a good chance they’ll treat most anyone they meet in a similar fashion.

You see chivalry teaches civility.

And God know there’s a shortage of that today.



I’m fascinated with how some little league coaches are so fanatical … so obsessed with what they think is their responsibility to put their mark, their brand, on every kid they coach.

Once, a baseball coach grabbed hold of me after a game and told me that my son, who at the time probably wasn’t even 9, should spend more time hitting off a tee—that I should work with him on his swing. That it was a priority and that it would help him to be a better player.  


I just politely nodded and remarked, “Well, tonight we have homework to work on. You know … reading, writing, rithmatic. And I have to tell you … the kid holds his spoon like caveman— AND, he chews his food with his mouth open—DRIVES ME CRAZY.  We should probably work on that too. I don’t even want to talk about the food all over his face.  Not only that, we‘re also working on making his bed, picking up his clothes and putting things back to where they belong. Then of course there’s stuff like learning to open his mother’s door, letting his mother go first, holding his mothers coat … you know, gentlemen stuff. And the kid has to be told to brush his teeth—EVERY DAY! Comb his hair—EVERY DAY! We’re also working on a firm handshake, looking people in the eye, addressing adults directly and respectfully with Mr. and Mrs. So, working on his swing … well, it’s sort of at the bottom of the list … well, not even on the list.”

Working on my kids swing is only priority when he’s old enough to make it his priority … after me and his mom teach him what priorities are. But at 9, he doesn’t know a priority from sorority. 

He’s out to have fun ... Period.

And suggesting he work on a tee is not only, not, on our list of important things, it’s not even on his.

He wants to play baseball at 9, not work at it.

His coach needs to work at making the game so much fun for those little kids that passion wells up and flows over—making working at their swing their passion—their priority … some day, if they so desire. 

But, if my son ever decides to make his swing one of the more important things in his life, more power to him. I only hope I get a seat in the stadium close enough for him to hear me cry with joy … for him.

But it won’t be a priority because a coach made him work at it at 9; it’ll be a priority because we, his parents, worked at making it our priority to teach how priorities work.

That’s just one of our jobs as parents.

We can’t allow fanatical coaches to convince us that our little boys and girls, our 7, 8, 9, and 10 … year-olds need to make working on their game a priority.

It isn’t. That’ll be their decision—someday—if we make it our priority to do our jobs today.  



Once, when our boys were around 4 and 5 years old they witnessed another boy about their own age throw a tantrum while walking through the mall.

It was a classic outburst.

Flailing and dropping to his knees, the kid yanked and tried to pull away from his mother’s grip as she squatted down to his level and tried to reason with him.

My sons looked curiously at the boy as we passed.

 “Noooo! Let go!” The kid screamed as his mother continued with reason. “I want to go back! …Nooo! Let go!” he continued while swinging wildly—striking his mother. 

My youngest guy’s eyebrows raised and eyes widened, “Dad … he’s gonna need a pair of spank proof pants!”

Kids who get a little swat on the pants generally get the message a little quicker … and lot longer than those who don’t.

Why is it that spanking a misbehaving child is unacceptable these days?

Is it because there are knuckleheads who don’t know the difference between a spanking and a beating?

People can’t control themselves in all manner of activity. …. Parenting is no exception. 

So because there are absolute jackass parents out there who can’t decipher the difference between a swat and a beating, every other responsible parent on earth need avoid reasonable discipline?

I’m not saying you should spank your kids. I’m saying one idiot’s irresponsible behavior shouldn’t have influence over another’s responsible behavior. 

Should we all be on diets? Refrain from alcohol?  How about driving?

Anything can be handled irresponsibly.

That’s the problem with what’s going on these days.

Whether you’re responsible or irresponsible, there’s seems to be a communal force that wants to suppress accountability. It seems there’s a growing army of bleeding hearts who look to the community to bear the brunt of irresponsibility and share the wealth of responsibility.

Taking your best shot and accelerating past your competition isn’t nice.

If one kid is better than the rest, let’s ask him to slow down so all the rest can compete. If one kids being disruptive … don’t single him out, address and reprimand the entire class so he doesn’t get embarrassed.   

Everything is being pulled down to the least common denominator.

God forbid we single someone out for exceptional … or inexcusable behavior.

No. No one should be singled out.

Everyone should make the team. No one should get an F. Nobody should benefit from the harsh hand of fair and measured praise or discipline.

We’re in a race for mediocrity—a race to parity.  

And still, with all this effort for equality, all this effort to make everyone feel good, the world is getting crueler.

Kids who think they have reason to take a swing at parents who only try reason, run a higher risk of actually needing those spank proof pants as they grow older.  

Problem is … they’ll be out of luck. Because there are no spank proof pants in life. 


Law of Attraction ... The Secret ... Bull!

It happened again.

Because of what I do I check out seminars, webinars and read a fair amount.

Today I logged on to a webinar and five minutes in I realized I wasn’t in Kansas anymore. I closed my eyes, tapped my heels and chanted, “There’s no place like home … There’s no place like home.” But when I opened my eyes I was still the magical Land of Oz

 Somebody had mistaken me for the Tin Man.

Today’s webinar was supposed to be about building a better life. And evidently that idea is a secret because all the host talked about was the Law of Attraction and the mega-million bestselling book, The Secret.

You know the book. The one that says the secret is, “Think about what you want and it’ll appear.”  

Getting what you want isn’t a secret.

It’s hard work.

If you ever read my book, The Z Factor you know how much I disagree with the entire “Secret” premise.

If it were as easy as thinking about what you want and it’ll appear—I’d be eating a piece of cherry pie right about … now!  

Building a life better than the one you earned … the one you have, is hard work.

It takes time. Not only do you have to believe it’ll happen for you, you have to have the work ethic and stamina to wait for it to happen.

Eighteen years. That’s how many years it took for me to get published. Five years. That’s how long I trained to get my shot in the NFL. Fifteen years. That’s how long it took for one of my ideas to be a hit in retail. A lot went on during and in-between. I went broke, left good paying jobs for menial minimum wage jobs, worked bars, bartered services, lost everything I had and have lots more to tell.

So yeah, I get a little pissed when some yahoo who has never really done anything—other than sell the idea of the “secret” tells me … and others that they can attract success by thinking positive.

Run, don’t walk away from the idea that you can think your way to success.

Good positive thinking has its place … it sits alongside extraordinary effort, hard work and sacrifice.  

Now I got to find an oil can and walk to the bakery to pick up a cherry pie.




I’ve got an idea for another business.

You’ve all heard of the 18 year old “kid” that sued her parents over tuition, household rules, dating, blah, blah, blah. She’s not the only one who has, will, or wants to either.

Anyhow … the business.

These kids deserve a voice, a place to be comfortable, a place to express themselves, a place where they can exercise their God given freedoms and date whoever they want, come and go as they please.

Kids have rights too, you know.

The business …

I want to open up a facility where these kids can come to live. A giant building with individual living spaces to include kitchens, baths and bedrooms in each space—with reasonable amenities like refrigerators, hot water heaters, washers and dryers so that these kids can be as comfortable as they were when at home.   

My idea would be to allow these kids to come and go as they see fit. Date whoever and whenever they want. Go to any school they choose or if they want … no school!

After all, they’re 18.

What makes my idea work is the monthly fee I’ll charge these kids.

You know to offset the cost of the building I’ll have to buy—and a few bucks for my troubles.

I’m thinking about $1,200 month, per space, per kid.

Of course if they want food, phone, transportation, air conditioning and other comforts of home, they’ll have to pay a bit more.  

But not a bad deal for all those freedoms—ya think?


Someone already came up with idea.


Someone ought to tell those kids about it.

Someone ought to tell their parents.  


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